I recently met with a woman who came to me hoping to discover why she was so miserable.
She felt unfulfilled in her work and didn’t seem to have much in her life that inspired her or brought her joy.
After some discussion, we identified many things happening in her experience that weren’t quite matching up with what she had hoped her life would be, and she was beginning to get pretty clear about the subjects that brought her the most angst.
She then suddenly declared with great passion, “I just want to be happy!”
So, I asked her what needed to happen for her to truly be happy.
“I’ll be happy when I find a better job with a higher salary.”
“I’ll be happy when my husband decides he wants to be an active participant in our marriage.”
“I’ll be happy when we can finally get out of debt.”
We’re all guilty of practicing “conditional” happiness. We believe that once our conditions are met, we’ll then have reached that perfect place of bliss where all is right with the world. We’ll be happy and content forever and forever.
We spend most of our days dreaming about that “someday”.
Did you know that practicing unconditional happiness is THE single biggest tool you have to instantly improve your life? And, I do mean instantly!
Happiness is at the core of everything you wish to be, do, or have in this lifetime.
This is going to seem very counter intuitive, but instead of jumping into action to find that perfect job or mate, the real key is to just get happy! It’s really all about finding current things in your life that make you feel happy when you think about them, then doing your best to stay in that feeling as long as you can, as often as you can.
I know it sounds silly, and actually even a little daunting to think about having to maintain the vibration of happiness all day long, but that’s actually where the real magic happens.
If you can find things to think about that make you happy and maintain that great feeling for even just 68 seconds, the Universe will begin delivering great ideas, people, and opportunities that match.
Think about it. We’ve all had those days where we start off in a bad mood and decide to stay there. The rest of the day we are met with negative people, frustrations, and upsets that just continue to fuel our bad mood.
So, what if you spent the day focusing your thoughts only on things that make you feel happy when you think about them? Doesn’t it make sense that your day would line up with whatever was needed to fuel that great mood?
Sure, it’s much easier to focus on the problems in your life, but how’s that working for ya?
Take a day and make a game of it. Every hour, stop what you’re doing and take just a minute to think of something, really anything, that makes you blissfully happy.
It doesn’t really matter how you reach a feeling of happiness. It can be a memory, the vision of the perfect beach, a funny YouTube video, or even listening to your favorite music while you’re dancing around the room.
Just get there and stay in that feeling for as long as you can, as often as you can.
That vibration of happiness is what will unlock the jobs, the relationships, the money, the health and every other person, place, or thing that the Universe is so excited to bring you! You will be led to take inspired action and it will feel, oh so good!
Try to look at the world as you did when you were a child. Children know that it’s always about having fun. They think about the fun they’re having, and then think about the fun they’re planning to have the next day and the next!
If you can begin thinking about what makes you happy today, knowing that there will more things to be happy about tomorrow, you are well on your way to being the deliberate creator of joy that you intended to be!
Let me know your thoughts on the subject! And, if you take a day and give this a try, let me know what magic occurs in your day. I’d love to hear your thoughts
Do you have fond childhood memories of Christmas?
I sure do. Way too many to count.
One of my very favorite parts of the holiday was the decorating of our house the weekend after Thanksgiving.
I remember the smell of the fresh evergreen in the living room. A Bing Crosby Christmas album played in the background as we decorated the tree.
My father would hang the lights making sure the multi-colored bulbs were evenly dispersed. Once they were placed on the tree, he would turn off the room lights, take off his glasses and squint to see the colors of the bulbs “pop” in his unfocused gaze.
My sister and I would then hang the ornaments while my mother opened boxes and boxes of holiday decorations to be placed around the house. She was a master at “decking the halls”. We had everything from festive card holders to painted ceramic Christmas trees.
If I close my eyes, I can almost hear the music, smell the tree, and feel the love.
I believe that our loved ones on the other side draw very close to us this time of year. They too, share in the memories and join in the festivities of the holidays.
In fact, I can assure you that your loved ones in spirit will be joining in as you watch the children open gifts and again as you raise a toast to greet the new year.
Can you feel them lightly touching your shoulder or whispering your name? Do you think of them when a special carol is heard or when you prepare their favorite fudge recipe?
This is my favorite time of year to be a Medium. I am always thrilled when a spirit comes through to a loved one sharing memories of Christmas past. It may be remembering an undesirable fruit cake incident, or a rowdy game of cards that was played around the holiday table. Those memories are still precious to our friends and families who have left the physical body.
So, as you hustle and bustle to every party, Christmas program, and shopping mall, remember to be open to the signs from friends and family you hold so dear, who are no longer here in physical form.
They are very near and want more than anything for you to feel their love and truly know that they are still very much a part of your life.
The physical body may cease to exist, but love never dies.
Many blessings to you and your family this holiday season.
I have a confession to make.
I watched the first presidential debate.
I just couldn’t help myself. It was like that car wreck you see on the side of the road. Even though you try not to look, you just feel compelled to catch a glimpse.
And I knew better. Really, I did.
By the end of that ninety minutes I was mad, frustrated, insulted and just downright gnarly. My husband sat quietly in the same room the entire evening with only one comment at the very end, “I told you not to watch it, didn’t I?”
I knew by watching the debate and allowing it to cause such negative emotion within me, that I had literally cast my vibrational vote.
It’s easy to do. Whenever we give our attention to any subject (or candidate) we literally help it grow bigger and bigger.
In all honestly, we really need to stop blaming Hilary and Donald for this mess.
Don’t throw darts at me yet. Hang with me….
We’ve all helped create this firestorm of insult-hurling, topic-avoiding nonsense. We’ve given both candidates fuel via the avenues of social media and network news to stir up the negative emotion in millions of people not only in the United States but around the world.
For those of you who believe we are vibrational beings, you also know that our personal frequency affects every other person on the planet. We are all connected. When one of us feels negative emotion, its’ effects can be felt far and wide like the ripples from a stone thrown in a lake.
I seriously wonder if that’s why we have Hurricane Matthew churning in the ocean. All that anger, rage, and frustration just swirling into a big storm. Mother Nature? I’m not so sure.
So, enough of the gloom and doom. There really is an upside to this whole circus act. This craziness gives us the opportunity to become very clear about what we’d like to experience as we continue on our journey.
Let’s look at what we hope to achieve by electing a new president. Take the two candidates out of it completely. Just what are we wanting the outcome of this election to do for us, both individually and as a nation?
We are all hoping that the next president will help us move forward on a happier path, right?
We want peace, personal freedom, cooperation, harmony, economic stability and growth, tolerance and above all else…love of each other, our country and our world.
Do we really, really believe that our new president, whomever is elected, has the ability to make sure each and every one of us has an incredibly joyous experience while we’re here on the planet?
Not. A. Chance.
The outcome of this election is irrelevant to what happens in your personal experience. It only affects you if the negative emotions that are provoked in you like fear, concern, worry, etc. are allowed to swirl into your personal vibration. Period.
You can personally experience love, peace, harmony, etc., in your life no matter who is elected our next president.
You have the freedom to decide how you’re going to feel every single day. You not only get to choose the way you feel, but also the thoughts that you think, which lead to the experiences you have in your life.
Make your focus of each day to find alignment with your Source, Higher Self, or Soul. What you call that energy doesn’t really matter, it’s more about how it “feels”.
You are an unlimited being with the power to create worlds. You are here to experience the contrast that life gives you which then launches the clarity of what you’d prefer. Your only job is to allow the stream of well-being to inspire the actions which lead to your preferences.
Take your attention off of the election and the candidates. Don’t talk about it. Don’t watch the news. Try and avoid it on Facebook and Twitter, and Instagram, and Snapchat, and…well, you see where I’m going with this.
Wake up every morning looking and expecting to see more of what you wish to experience.
If you want to feel love, be love to everyone who crosses your path.
If you wish to experience cooperation with others, expect to meet people who work well together for a common goal.
See and appreciate the abundance you have in your life this very minute knowing that as you do, more is on the way in many forms.
Above all else, always remember that only you create the reality you experience; not your family, not your best friend, your boss, your mate, or your president.
May the force be with you. (cue Star Wars music)
The previous statement is probably eliciting one of two responses....
You are ready to hit the "delete" button, swearing under your breath about what a Pollyanna I am and that I need to get a life.
Or, you're nodding in agreement thinking about what a terrific day you've had so far, with great anticipation as to what's ahead.
Maybe you're somewhere in the middle. You got up this morning, had a good cup of coffee, all the while thinking what a great weekend you had and how difficult it is to get motivated to head back to work.
We've all been there, but did you know you really have a great deal of control in just how your Monday takes shape?
For most of us, as soon as our feet hit the floor our brains are off and running. Our daily "To Do" list pops in our head in addition to maybe the grocery list and the list of emails you know need to be returned as soon as possible.
You step into the shower continuing this train of thought until you get frustrated after you find yourself not remembering whether you washed your hair before putting in the conditioner. That's always my sign that I have completely forgotten to be present.
I'd like to challenge you to try a different approach to your Monday morning, or any morning you're feeling less than excited about the day ahead.
Start the day with appreciation, my friend.
It can start as you pull yourself out of bed and stagger into the bathroom. Instead of the usual inner dialog you may have about how nice it would be just to go back to bed instead of facing the day, how about you just stand there for a moment and feel a deep appreciation for another day on the planet?
Instead of belittling your body about how you really need to lose those last ten pounds or how wrinkled you're becoming, look into your eyes and appreciate the vessel that has carried your spirit around every day since birth.
I'd even challenge you to continue this dialog as you enter the shower. Think back lovingly to something about your weekend or the day before that made you smile. Relive the memory and feel the warm fuzziness all over again.
By feeling the emotion of deep appreciation and joy as you start your day, you have just dialed your vibrational set point to a place where it is attracting other experiences, people, and opportunities that match.
How great is that?
What's even more amazing, is that you can check in throughout the day and redial that set point at any time. The way your day is going is always a direct match to your vibrational set point. Always.
I challenge you to get up tomorrow morning and begin the day with sincere gratitude. Say it, feel it, and know it in your heart.
What have you got to lose?
Spring is hands-down my favorite season. Who doesn't love chubby robins and those perky tulips?
Spring is the only season that inspires me to clean out closets, wash comforters, and dust places I usually pretend not to see. It's the perfect time to clear out clutter both in our homes and in our lives.
What "clutter" do you need to release? Maybe it's a negative thought pattern. Could it be the long hours you've been putting in at work? Is there someone in your life who constantly drains your energy?
Spring is the perfect time to gain true clarity about what you want to manifest in your life. Clear out the clutter and define what new experiences, people, and opportunities you'd like to bring with you on your journey.
What's your job after you create a clear picture of what you'd like to manifest? Allow it. Do absolutely whatever it takes to keep your vibration in alignment with Source.
Be present in the moment and feel the joy of the new season. Walk outside and bask in the warmth of the sun. Appreciate the green grass and new leaves popping up, the blooms on the flowers, or the sound of a thunderstorm.
The more you allow the connection to Source, the more your life experience will be a reflection of that alignment.
Always remember that you have the most amazing inner guidance system. Your emotions are the perfect indicators of your moment-by-moment connection to Source.
Now, go clean out that garage and get happy!
I get all kinds of questions. Some are funny like, "Does my deceased grandmother see me in the shower?" Others can be quite sweet such as, "Does my deceased husband know that I wear his pajamas to bed every night?"
Sometimes I get a question that is really deep, like black hole deep. I adore these questions as they give me an opportunity to share some of the knowledge I've gained during my travels around the country learning about all things metaphysical.
A question came this week from a wonderful woman who is incredibly intuitive herself. I won't include her entire question, but I'm hoping it's okay if I give the gist of her inquiry. I have a feeling this is a question that many of you have, so I think it's perfect to share this will all of you!
"So I have a really mind bending question for you! Ok, so someday I'm old and gray. I pass away and go to Heaven. Years from then my kids also pass away and meet me in Heaven. From what I've read they will recognize me and we hang out and have a great time. However, if we all have past lives I would only assume that we will have future lives.
So say I go back to earth, but this time I am born an African American boy in Kenya. Now.....when I pass away in that lifetime and go back to Heaven, will I see my boys again or will I reunite with my new Kenyan family?
I was always under the assumption that when you die, you meet up with all your family and hang out for all eternity. But is that time limited until we reincarnate and take on a new life? Does the appearance of my soul change with each lifetime where my husband and kids will no longer recognize me? Does this make sense?
Isn't that a GREAT question? The following was my response:
"That is a really great question. I will share with you what I've come to believe after hearing so many different perspectives from both the living and the dead.
I believe that we are multidimensional beings. At our very core, we are a beautiful source of energy...an offspring of the Creator, Universe, God, or whatever name you'd like to give that energy. Quantum theorists believe that everything that has happened, is happening, and will happen is happening at the exact same time. This means that there is a good chance we are experiencing many different lives simultaneously. Weird, huh? There is also the theory that there are many dimensions of our planet and that we may actually have an identical twin, or possibly another version of our current self, operating on these other dimensions at this very moment! How cool, or freaky, is that?
The most important thing to remember is that we choose the reality, or lifetime, we wish to plug into. So, imagine that we have the choice of 20 different realities, or lifetimes. It would be like 20 different shows recorded on a DVR and we get to choose which one we watch at any given moment. Another way to look at it is that our higher self can choose where it wishes to express itself at any given moment. We put our awareness into this reality during the day, but maybe when we astral travel we pop into a different lifetime.
So yes, you could be experiencing another lifetime as a man in Kenya, and any other Souls connected to that lifetime and dimension will continue to be a part of that experience even after death. In fact, you could also be a lovely woman in China at the same time and have an entire family who will continue to connect with you after your death as that Chinese woman. I believe that our relatives from EVERY lifetime will not cease being a part of lives even after we reincarnate.
I think as humans on this planet, we are very limited in what we can comprehend. I have a feeling its much, much bigger than we could ever imagine! Doesn't that just blow your mind?!
Life doesn’t come with a guarantee. There’s no warranty to fall back on should you encounter anything that causes life to fall short of a joyous experience. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we knew that the choices made in our life, big and small, had a 100% satisfaction guarantee?
If it did, how many of you would take the leap of faith necessary to create real change in your life? Maybe you’d quit your job and decide to travel the world. Or perhaps, you’d sell your possessions, donate a large portion of the proceeds to your favorite charity, then choose to live a lighter, simpler life. Some of you might even return to school to finish your education, or change directions entirely and study whatever inspires you at the moment.
Ah, but what if? What if your new adventure didn't go exactly as you planned or didn’t work out the way you hoped it would? Would you fall apart completely and dissolve into nothingness? No! You’d get up, brush yourself off, and move on to the next adventure.
What’s so interesting, is that life really does come with a type of guarantee. If you take that leap of faith in whatever direction you’re inspired to go, you are guaranteed that it will be life-changing. You will meet new people and have new experiences, giving you the opportunity to learn even more about yourself. Will it always be joyful? No. Enlightening? Yes, most definitely.
I am one of those people who has really taken advantage of that guarantee. I’ve taken leaps off of many cliffs, not having any idea what the outcome would be. I just always knew that I’d be okay wherever I landed.
My last leap did not disappoint me. I returned to Mind Body Spirit of Omaha a little over a month ago and it was indeed life-changing. I met some great people, got to know my attorney a little better, but most of all I learned a whole lot about me. Without going into great detail, let’s just say it was one of those experiences where it might have been nice to have a 100% satisfaction guarantee. It definitely didn’t turn out quite like I had hoped.
This was a great opportunity to practice what I preach. I tell clients all the time to embrace life and follow the guidance they are given. Even though you may not be able to see the outcome of any leap you might make, at least you know you’re taking advantage of the guarantee that we all have….. experiencing an enlightened journey. So what are you waiting for?
Life really is like a roller coaster ride, isn’t it?
The twists and turns. The ups and downs. It can be quite an adrenaline rush. We may squeal with excitement or look for the nearest trash can to vomit in. (That would be me. I do NOT do roller coasters or boat rides in really rough waters. Sorry if that’s really more than you wanted to know.)
There are lots of metaphors I could use, but it would all boil down to the same thing. Life is exhausting, exhilarating, frustrating, surprising, nauseating, and a zillion other adjectives, some probably not appropriate for the blogging world. And sometimes we just want to yell, “Let me off this ride!”
I’ve spent my share of days looking for the nearest trash can. Nothing has gone right, plans have fallen through, technology has crashed and blew up into one big scheduling disaster….well, you get the picture. I’ve also had my share of amazing days like when I watched my youngest graduate from high school, attended the beautiful wedding of two lovely Souls, and when I got to spend an afternoon just sitting on my deck reading. Ah, life can be so good.
The last few weeks in my own life have reminded me how important it is to keep on, keeping on. (Isn’t that a song once done by the Brady Brunch?) Sometimes, we just don’t want to put on our big girl pants and keep dealing with the reality in front of us! It’s easy to get buried in the monthly bills, the crazy schedules and the less-than-happy relationships, but in the end try and remember that you signed up for this experience. That includes the good, the bad, and the just plain ugly! There’s a blessing in everything and undoubtedly, an important lesson to boot.
Every morning I set my intentions for the day with a prayer and always, always, always start off by thanking the Creator for another day on this planet. It’s yet another day to love, laugh, and be of service to others. I get to feel the warm sunshine on my face. I’m given the opportunity to tell the important people in my life how much I appreciate them. I can spread kindness, with even just a smile or a “hello”. I might even put my bare feet in the grass to feel appreciation and love for the planet. Did you ever stop to think how much possibility lies in each and every day?
So, tomorrow morning before you put on your big girl pants, stop and thank the Universe for yet another day on this beautiful planet. Carpe Diem!
My 91 year-old grandmother decided it was time to go home.
Earlier this week, I was with her as she took her last breath. She became very quiet and peaceful as her frail heart decided it was time to rest. The room was still other than my aunt’s gentle sobbing. My sister stood holding my grandmother's hand with tears in her eyes, and I felt sadness as well, but I knew her Soul was already on its way home. I could almost feel her giddiness and joy as she was reunited with family and friends on the Other Side. I knew she could now walk without pain, drive a car if she wanted to, and can once again play cards with her bridge club.
She’d went into the hospital shortly before Easter Sunday and I think we all knew at that time the end was near. She lived a long life but she had become quite lonely in recent years. She’d lost her husband and both siblings, and watched her friends die one by one. I guess that’s the trouble with living to a ripe old age.
On her final day, I was visited by many of her relatives who had died before her. I could feel her husband from the very moment I first visited her in the hospital, but on this last day he had a much larger group with him. Let’s just say that the room was quite crowded. A true party had gathered to help her Soul transition home.
But what I’ll remember most about that day was the beautiful angel who stood behind her bed. I had seen the image immediately as I entered her room that morning. He was a tall angel with enormous wings that ascended way above his head. I came to find out later that this was Archangel Razael who was there to take my grandmother home when she was ready to go. How wonderful to know that we are so loved and cared for in our last hours.
I tell all of my clients that their loved one’s spirit stays with them as they make funeral preparations, and I’ve heard so many deceased loved one tell me details about the service whether it’s the weather that day, the flowers, songs that were sung and by whom, or even what was served at the luncheon. They know you are suffering a human loss so it’s important to them to help you find comfort in those early days.
I went with my aunt the next day to help plan the service, and on my way I asked my grandmother to give us a hand in selecting exactly what she wanted. Now, mind you, she had almost everything lined up and ready which was so wonderful, but there were still a few details needing to be tied up. One of those was the flowers. As we were sitting in the office with the pastor, a flower shop delivered the most beautiful bouquet for another service taking place later that day. We knew exactly which florist we were going to use before seeing the arrangement, but we were even more sure about our choice after seeing their work.
After our meeting concluded I was sent to the florist to place our order. On my way over, I again asked my grandmother to please give me some sort of sign that would help me make the right selection. I met with the florist and was shown many beautiful types of arrangements, but then I was reminded of the bouquet at the funeral home. I asked the woman if she remembered the bouquet, and found that she had actually been the one who designed it. I told her how much we loved it, but we were wondering if we could in some way honor the six grandchildren and the ten great grandchildren with special colors or flowers in that same design. The gal just laughed and said, “ That’s so funny. That arrangement I delivered this morning had 6 red carnations for the grandchildren and 10 purple mums for the great grandchildren.” I just looked up and smiled.
Thanks, grandma. I think the flowers will be perfect, too.
We’ve all got those wonderful “To Do” lists. I happen to carry a small notebook with me that holds my lists for both home and work. I’ve even got these lists broken down into daily, weekly, and monthly. A little over the top? Maybe. Ultra organized? Hardly. Most of the time, I leave the stupid thing at home in my office! Some good it does me there!
The one I have for my hubby is called the “Honey Do” list. There are enough different projects on that list to keep him busy for the next five or six years! I’ve got that list broken down into different categories as well. Short term projects like finally getting the new garage door opener up is something on my “This Month” list, whereas restoring my 1973 VW Beetle convertible is on the “Please Get it Done Before You Die” list. As you can see, I’m not too optimistic about that one!
Another favorite is my “Gratitude” list. I keep this one in a journal beside my bed. Every night before shutting my eyes, I write down three things in my life that I truly appreciate. It could be the extremely soft Egyptian cotton sheets my mom gave me that I get to sleep on every night. (Yes, I do take them off to wash them!) Maybe it’s a great conversation I had that day with one of my kids. It might even be the fact that my kitchen island stayed clutter-free for more than one hour! It doesn’t take much to make me happy!
Recently, I’ve started a new list. This one is called the “Stop Doing” list. I know it sounds quite counter-productive, but it’s really quite amazing. On this list you will only find things that I need to stop doing in order to live a more joy-filled life. And that’s why we’re here, right? Let me give you some examples. I’ve listed quite a few things in a new little notebook. I am going to stop spending time with people who drain my energy. I’m going to stop freaking out that my youngest son’s room smells like a locker room. He’s heading off to college next year and without that smell I’ll be reminded that he’s not around. (That doesn’t sound right, but I’m sure you know what I mean!) I even have one entry in all capital letters that reminds me to stop worrying about what other people think of me. Who really cares?
What’s great about the “Stop Doing” list is that I never cross anything off. I actually add to it anytime I fancy. I use this list as a constant reminder of doing, or actually "not" doing, anything that doesn’t bring me joy or inspiration. I only wish I could add laundry and grocery shopping to this list! I suppose I’ll need to find something to appreciate about these chores so I can add them to my “Gratitude” list. Ha!
How about starting a “Stop Doing” list of your own? I dare you! What’s the first thing you’d add? I’d love for you to post a comment below!
As always, feel free to share this post with anyone who may benefit!